This post is dedicated to Kaylie, who told me I should publish it even though it's long, and who wanted to be a mailmom when she grew up. Also dedicated to all the people who share a dozen or so things about themselves on Facebook the past few weeks. Here's my response.
As a kid, I don't think I ever really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, but there were plenty of things that I wanted to be right then. This led to many short but illustrious careers. Here are the ones that I remember:
-I think the first thing I wanted to be was a mom. I can't remember for sure, but it makes sense. I mean, that's who I hung out with all the time. I liked the idea of a job where you drove to the bank and got Smarties for free. In practicing being a mom, I gave birth to lots of dolls that were hiding under my shirt.
-The next job I considered was an engineer. I didn't quite know what it was, but I knew there were two kinds -- the kind that drove trains and the kind that my dad was. And I think I wanted to be the kind my dad was. (There were also two kind of doctors -- the kind that helped sick people and the kind my dad was that taught classes. So confusing.) One of the first dolls I got I named Engineer ("Is that a Spanish name?" my friends would ask when I told them about her). I don't remember playing with her ever, but I do remember she was kind of ugly.
-Along the same lines, I think I wanted to be an inventor. When I was three or four, my dad's comb broke. I knew that it was made of plastic, so I figured I could make one of my own. I traced one of my mom's combs (except she didn't let me trace inside the teeth because she thought they would break, so it was just mildly bumpy) on some paper and then cut it out. I then put a plastic bag over it because plastic was plastic so naturally now my dad had a plastic comb again. When I realized that all plastic was not the same and my invention had failed, my career took a long hiatus.
-The next thing I wanted to be was a composer. After wearing my parents' ears out with my soulful tunes "Fall in love of everything and this is what it is!" and "What's your favorite color?", I figured my future career had a pretty strong start. Unfortunately, after a few submissions to Reflections contests, it never picked up momentum. (Truth is, I think I might be too happy now to write real music. That's okay with me.)
-At some point, I realized that out of the standard job answers of fireman, policeman, or doctor, being a doctor could be pretty cool. After all, you had to be really smart to be a doctor. Although I enjoyed chemistry and biology quite a bit, I never could get into anatomy or physiology, so this plan was nixed by high school. (Even now, the only bone I really remember is "femur." Oh wait, isn't tibia a bone? Have to start using that one now.)
-Somewhere in there, I am sure I wanted to be a teacher. I never managed to teach my younger siblings as much as Leslie taught me with the old chalkboard downstairs, but oh, did I have lesson plans. And even the start of a math book.
-When I was 8 or 9, I really wanted to be an architect because I loved to draw houses and house plans so much. I think this was the first career in a while that my dad really approved of, and he got excited. He ran to DI and got me all this drafting equipment and special rulers and whatnot. Right when I was about to start figuring out how to use all that junk, I asked my dad what it took to become an architect. He mentioned geometry. Even back then I knew instinctively that I hated geometry, and I ditched my architect plans almost immediately. (And I never stopped hating geometry. This makes the two years I spent on a 40 page paper on the Steiner problem on the regular tetrahedron as well as all the radar research and HFSS programming for senior project especially ironic.)
-Soon afterwards, I started to write lots of stories and poems. And I mean a lot. Very few of them were ever finished. And maybe that was a good thing. (I notice no one was really clamoring for the remaining 11 chapters.) I realized when I was about 14 that to actually become a good writer (prose, plot, etc) would take a kind of dedication and immunity to criticism that I just couldn't handle, so I gave it up.
-After that, I think the idea of my ideal career changed depending on what my favorite class was. Sometimes I really liked history. Sometimes I really liked math. Sometimes I still really liked the idea of knowing every language in the world. When I was looking at major maps the summer before college, I felt paralyzed by all the exciting options, and I'd eliminate options based on required classes that I thought I might hate. Based solely on the name, I seriously considered majoring in Food Science and signed up for a Thursday seminar at 11.
When I went to the class the first time, the professor enthusiastically showed us a power point of all the jobs Food Scientists had. It seemed like a lot of it had to do with canned foods not having botulism. All my dreams of learning how to make perfect candies and crispy, chewy breads vaporized in that instant, and I knew I would never major in food science. (Never mind that I think food science majors really did learn that stuff too. Just the cans were enough to deter me.) I signed up for the Electrical Engineering seminar at the same time, and I never looked back.
And so, I majored in electrical engineering. And math, because I couldn't stop taking math classes. And then I had a baby and now only use my degrees about once every six months. On the other hand, I find myself accompanying or doing musical numbers several times a year, except during November and December when it's about 43 times a week. And I also keep a blog. And I suppose I'm taking a crash course in early childhood education. So I guess my past career dreams are still alive, and always will be.
As a kid, I don't think I ever really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, but there were plenty of things that I wanted to be right then. This led to many short but illustrious careers. Here are the ones that I remember:
-I think the first thing I wanted to be was a mom. I can't remember for sure, but it makes sense. I mean, that's who I hung out with all the time. I liked the idea of a job where you drove to the bank and got Smarties for free. In practicing being a mom, I gave birth to lots of dolls that were hiding under my shirt.
-The next job I considered was an engineer. I didn't quite know what it was, but I knew there were two kinds -- the kind that drove trains and the kind that my dad was. And I think I wanted to be the kind my dad was. (There were also two kind of doctors -- the kind that helped sick people and the kind my dad was that taught classes. So confusing.) One of the first dolls I got I named Engineer ("Is that a Spanish name?" my friends would ask when I told them about her). I don't remember playing with her ever, but I do remember she was kind of ugly.
-Along the same lines, I think I wanted to be an inventor. When I was three or four, my dad's comb broke. I knew that it was made of plastic, so I figured I could make one of my own. I traced one of my mom's combs (except she didn't let me trace inside the teeth because she thought they would break, so it was just mildly bumpy) on some paper and then cut it out. I then put a plastic bag over it because plastic was plastic so naturally now my dad had a plastic comb again. When I realized that all plastic was not the same and my invention had failed, my career took a long hiatus.
-The next thing I wanted to be was a composer. After wearing my parents' ears out with my soulful tunes "Fall in love of everything and this is what it is!" and "What's your favorite color?", I figured my future career had a pretty strong start. Unfortunately, after a few submissions to Reflections contests, it never picked up momentum. (Truth is, I think I might be too happy now to write real music. That's okay with me.)
-At some point, I realized that out of the standard job answers of fireman, policeman, or doctor, being a doctor could be pretty cool. After all, you had to be really smart to be a doctor. Although I enjoyed chemistry and biology quite a bit, I never could get into anatomy or physiology, so this plan was nixed by high school. (Even now, the only bone I really remember is "femur." Oh wait, isn't tibia a bone? Have to start using that one now.)
-Somewhere in there, I am sure I wanted to be a teacher. I never managed to teach my younger siblings as much as Leslie taught me with the old chalkboard downstairs, but oh, did I have lesson plans. And even the start of a math book.
-When I was 8 or 9, I really wanted to be an architect because I loved to draw houses and house plans so much. I think this was the first career in a while that my dad really approved of, and he got excited. He ran to DI and got me all this drafting equipment and special rulers and whatnot. Right when I was about to start figuring out how to use all that junk, I asked my dad what it took to become an architect. He mentioned geometry. Even back then I knew instinctively that I hated geometry, and I ditched my architect plans almost immediately. (And I never stopped hating geometry. This makes the two years I spent on a 40 page paper on the Steiner problem on the regular tetrahedron as well as all the radar research and HFSS programming for senior project especially ironic.)
-Soon afterwards, I started to write lots of stories and poems. And I mean a lot. Very few of them were ever finished. And maybe that was a good thing. (I notice no one was really clamoring for the remaining 11 chapters.) I realized when I was about 14 that to actually become a good writer (prose, plot, etc) would take a kind of dedication and immunity to criticism that I just couldn't handle, so I gave it up.
-After that, I think the idea of my ideal career changed depending on what my favorite class was. Sometimes I really liked history. Sometimes I really liked math. Sometimes I still really liked the idea of knowing every language in the world. When I was looking at major maps the summer before college, I felt paralyzed by all the exciting options, and I'd eliminate options based on required classes that I thought I might hate. Based solely on the name, I seriously considered majoring in Food Science and signed up for a Thursday seminar at 11.
When I went to the class the first time, the professor enthusiastically showed us a power point of all the jobs Food Scientists had. It seemed like a lot of it had to do with canned foods not having botulism. All my dreams of learning how to make perfect candies and crispy, chewy breads vaporized in that instant, and I knew I would never major in food science. (Never mind that I think food science majors really did learn that stuff too. Just the cans were enough to deter me.) I signed up for the Electrical Engineering seminar at the same time, and I never looked back.
And so, I majored in electrical engineering. And math, because I couldn't stop taking math classes. And then I had a baby and now only use my degrees about once every six months. On the other hand, I find myself accompanying or doing musical numbers several times a year, except during November and December when it's about 43 times a week. And I also keep a blog. And I suppose I'm taking a crash course in early childhood education. So I guess my past career dreams are still alive, and always will be.
My mom had the same problem with choosing a major, and was told in a blessing that she would have the opportunity to do all the things. So she majored in EE because she figured she wouldn't have a chance to go back and do that in the same way as she might the others. It sounds like you're doing something similar - you get to do all the things!
ReplyDeleteWhen I type in "Steiner problem on the regular tetrahedron" into google your paper was the first one to come up. But, alas, I can't download it unless I pay $9.95...
ReplyDelete