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Showing posts from January, 2020

Moms

Tonight after gymnastics, John asked if his teacher was a mom. I said I wasn't sure. "I think she is. Because she has a phone." "Well, maybe that is because she is a grownup," I responded.  "I know my preschool teacher is a mom, because she has bathrooms at her house." Someone is a mom if they have a phone and a bathroom. In the words of Sheri L. Dew, are we not all mothers? 

Library Planning Meeting

LIBRARY DIRECTOR: Hello, everyone! Thanks for being here. We're here to discuss ways to make the library more child friendly. I have invited a special guest who has helped design libraries across the country. Say hello! (Everyone murmurs "hello" to the GUEST.) DIRECTOR: Now, let me know what you have so far. LIBRARIAN 1: We have installed some bright new couches and some cushions that will be fun for babies to crawl over. We tried to get some that won't get too germy. LIBRARIAN 2: We have lots of tables set up for kids to color at. DIRECTOR: That sounds great! I think we need just one more thing to make this a great children's library section. LIBRARIAN 1: I think puzzles would be great. Lots and lots of wooden puzzles. Little kids love those. LIBRARIAN 2: I think lots of toys would be great. Duplos, trains, other building toys, maybe play food, maybe puppets, stuff like that. DIRECTOR (turning to the guest): What do you suggest? GUEST: Those are all nice ideas, b

Regression

Me: I have a bad joke for you. Kevin: Okay. Me: What do you call a really nice group of nerds? Kevin: What? Me: Least mean squares. Kevin: That's terrible. Thirty seconds later: Kevin: I think I'm going to use that in my class.