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What do we owe to each other?

(This is another Holy Week post.)

I have been surprised by how much I like the Good Place. The first episode was totally bizarre (like Spy Kids, my younger sister pointed out), and I still cringe at the substitute swear words and innuendo (at a RS activity tonight I told people I didn't even say "Oh my gosh" until recently, and only when my kids are all crying at the same time or refusing to get out of the car, if that gives you an idea for what kind of language I'm used to). But even so. I think it is hilarious and thought-provoking. Just like yours truly, har har.

One of the last episodes of the third season has really gotten me thinking lately. (Warning: Spoilers abound.) The judge of the universe has caught up with our friends, and they try to defend themselves by saying that no one has made it into the Good Place since the early 1500s because life is just too complicated now for us to do more good than bad. Every breath we exhale now adds to the carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. Each product we buy has probably been tainted with the atrocities of slavery. In this dog-eat-dog world, it's all we can do to survive, let alone make any time for self-improvement. In contrast, they say that the Good Place simulation they lived in took away all of those earthly distractions so there was no reason for them to do anything but improve.

I found this exchange really interesting for two reasons. The first is that, frankly, I have spent the past year doing everything I can to make my life as pleasant as possible. We worked really, really hard to make a nice house with rooms all the right size, with paint colors that didn't have any unpleasant undertones, and with windows with all the right views. I have tried to fill my life with good things -- music lessons, volunteering, church service, good books, and quality family time (including the quality time where my mom is nice and watches my kids) -- and as a result, most of the time I feel fairly content. (Except for those moments I guess where I throw my hands up and say "Oh my gosh" but saying that is funny enough that it helps me not get mad at the kids.) So yes, I am doing my best to make my life simple and happy, and I think that if I'm not actively improving or amassing "Good Place" points, I'm not becoming a worse person most of the time.

But my second reason for finding that exchange interesting is that it almost seems opposite of what we learn in church. A good chunk of 2 Nephi 2 is about the importance of opposition in all things. In the Book of Moses we read that Adam and Eve are actually glad that they left the Garden of Eden:

10 And in that day Adam blessed God and was filled, and began to prophesy concerning all the families of the earth, saying: Blessed be the name of God, for because of my transgression my eyes are opened, and in this life I shall have joy, and again in the flesh I shall see God.
11 And Eve, his wife, heard all these things and was glad, saying: Were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient.

So which is it? Are we better off in the Garden of Eden or in a dreary world? Does an easy life make us too soft or does a difficult life make us too hard?

One thing's for certain -- a point system doesn't make sense. I was glad when the show finally acknowledged that we all (not just since the 1500s) have "sinned and come short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23). No amount of almond milk abstention or snail funeral services will save us. There is just no way to win.

For a long time this was the easiest way for me to understand the Atonement. One sin meant we were out of luck. Just not enough points. Luckily Christ had infinity points so as long as we were on His team our negative points plus infinity points were still infinity points and we were fine.

But lately, I've thought of the Atonement more in terms of reconciliation. Points might not matter, but relationships do. And sometimes relationships are harmed by our actions or words. If we believe that "the same sociality which exists among us here will exist among us there [in heaven]," (D&C 130:2), then this life is a time to strengthen those relationships and "practice heaven" the best we can. It takes repentance, meekness, forgiveness, and compassion to practice heaven, and none of those come easily to the natural man. Thankfully, they do come easily to God, and as we draw near to God we will get better at all of those. As we let Christ in He helps clean the hardness and bitterness out of our hearts so we will have more room for His love.

When I think about the Atonement this way, it doesn't seem to matter so much whether my life is hard or easy. I don't have to beat myself up for blessings or become a martyr during trials. The most important question becomes, "Am I using the opportunities I have been given to learn to love better, whether it is love toward my family, community, or world?" If I am filled with love then I will want to be as good as possible, points or no points.

As Chidi says, "So, why do it then? Why choose to be good every day if there is no guaranteed reward we can count on, now or in the afterlife? I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people, and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone."

Perhaps, then, it isn't opposition that makes us better. Perhaps it was the opportunity to have seed -- to have more people to love -- that brought Eve so much joy. Perhaps it was the opportunity to have a deeper relationship with God that brought Adam so much joy. And I think this is what we owe not only to each other, but also to ourselves.

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