Good guys and bad guys

 As an 11-year-old, I already knew that the world was full of bad guys. The fractured fairy tales I would write with my sister and cousin were always full of villains doing dastardly deeds.

So, to have bad guys do bad things seemed almost logical. Of course they would fly a plane into a building. Of course they would want to destroy America. Who would have expected otherwise?

In some ways it wasn't surprising to suddenly be thrust into a story involving villains and evil terrorist groups. What was surprising was how shocked adults were about it.

There were flags everywhere. There were so many newspaper articles. The teachers at my middle school in central New Jersey would talk about it all the time. They still couldn't believe something like that could happen here. It was as if they had forgotten how bad the world could be.

Up until then, of course, I hadn't had too much exposure to bad events in the world. I vaguely remembered the Oklahoma City Bombing. I remembered Columbine. There had been something about Kosovo we had learned when we clipped current events from the newspaper.  I remember my mom being angry about a teacher in Afghanistan who was executed when part of her sleeve slipped and showed her forearm. But, overall, life was simple and good. It seemed most of the bad things were yet to come, and we expected them as part of the Second Coming.

Now I have an 11-year-old. There are a lot of current events we don't talk about with him. But he knows about Ukraine. He's heard my outspoken opinions on various politicians the way I heard outspoken opinions growing up. He and his little brother prayed every night for months for coronavirus to go away.

I feel bad that I can't keep every hard thing from my kids. I feel bad that they have to see the same vulnerability and powerlessness in adults that I discovered after 9/11. I feel bad that they have seen me emotional about news and distraught about personal tragedies. I don't blame them for asking "Why is the world like this????" (They also ask that same question each time they get a mosquito bite.)

And I still don't have a good answer to that question other than what I felt as an 11-year-old. The world is like this because the best stories have bad guys in them. But they also have heroes and bravery and goodness. They have people who don't give up even in the face of relentless challenges.

And just like in the best stories, we can hope that good will triumph.